Monday, January 10, 2011

colors - a poem

Looking back to dark times in life is discouraging, difficult and often pushes us into reasoned sadness. As I fingered through the pages of an old journal I had reserved for my rare creative moments, I found this poem written from a time of personal despair and grief. However, when I read it the sad feelings are remembered but not allowed to hurt me.  And I feel the hope the comes out of sadness, I remember that grief brings blessing, that pain is a problem (to reference the iconic C.S. Lewis) because we must endure it to see the beauty in the end. 
{Incidentally, I think this poem will solve some of the mystery surrounding the name of my blog - enjoy}

colors

I lost the colors
my own and my ability to see them.
amber, forest, shell and cocoa tones - 
gonelostgiventaken

my daylight was darker than an unmooned sky
all the colors faded from me and lost their glow
they turned to whispy white and patched grey shades
I became dark like the close black shadows I saw around me
darker and darker till
even the whispers of white began to char

but He came
the maker of color brought light that pierced my prison black place
and my eyes
he put the green back into them
and I saw the darkness
coveringdrippingpouring out of me

he wrenched it out so I could see - 
puddles of oily black and muddy grey below -
and then He made me white.

he held me 
stretched me out
repainted me with his colors.

- written on august.8.2007 by me

3 comments:

  1. Molly Anne. I am your biggest fan next to your wonderful husband. Mom and God are probably in the mix too. It is amazing to have glimpses into your mind through your writing. You are a precious child. How you could have become the woman you are with me as your father is a perfect example of the grace of God giving us what we could never deserve. I love you sweet girl. It is a privilege to be in any circle known to you. To be called your father is joy who's depths are impossible to sound. I have not comprehend it's depth.

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  2. i remember reading this in your room and thinking that you so perfectly painted your heart, at that time, in words. how incredible to see the way that Jesus brings such healing and beauty to our broken lives. love you molls.

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